Interested in friends and understanding
Hello! I am a happily married monogomous mom and stepmom. I was raised LDS but left the church and I now go to a christian church. I have always been fascinated with polygamy ... I know that it's not for me but I absolutely respect and support those who choose it. I love the show Big Love, I recently watched an episode of "Forbidden Love" about polygamy, and my ears perk up when news stories about polygamy arise. I am a jealous and selfish person ... I can't stand the fact that my husband has an EX-wife let alone the thought of sharing him in our marriage now LOL. For that reason I think I could learn a lot from polygamous women and I'd love to build some friendships! There are major tolerance and acceptance bridges that need to be crossed in our communities and I want to support that. Love to all!
Your Posting
Hey Twizzler,
Lemme guess...you have a polyg in the haystack? Closet polyg? Just messin with ya.
You're not alone with your feelings about your husband. Most women in a polygamous environment never quite overcome their jealousy--just most of them learn to control that feeling and not let it dominate their life.
Most men, conversely, are polygamists at heart. A man IS capable of loving more than one woman, wholly, perfectly, and women give their hearts to only one man, and often become fiercely loyal to that man in their life.
Our society has adopted a lot of Roman customs--and monogamy, is one of those customs.
As far as our contemporary society accepting polygamy...forget it. Most people view it as an aberration, and with loathing. And why? Because a polygamous environment brings forth an abundance of children, and somehow, having large families just isn't popular these days. But I love children, and as long as my wives feel the desire to bring life into this world, I'll do my small part in making that happen.
Thanks!
The closest I have come to polygamy is having a friend that married the non-polyg son of a polygamist. (Her MIL was a first wife).
My hubby says he couldn't handle any more wives, my emotions alone count for 20 :D
So can you explain to me what you mean when you say a man can "wholly, perfectly" love more than one woman? I know that my marriage suffers many times because of a lack of time together, we both work and have 4 kids. My small brain thinks that it seems like more people (especially women!) in the mix would add to the stress, not to the successfulness of the relationships.
Do your wives post on here?
Response
Twizzler,
In all honesty, I really don't know how to answer your question of me that I can wholly and perfectly love more than one woman; because I do. How can I not? I would ask that of any polyg. I would never recommend any woman or man go into a polygamous union without love being the root--or in any relationship between a man and wife.
Love is the foundation. The one thing I have found in the course of my life as a fundy polyg, is that my wives need that reassurance that they are wanted, they are loved. I don't permit any day to pass that I don't express my true love for them.
Yeah, it can be stressful, but really and ultimately, it is what you make of it. Most women think of the principle from a woman's perspective, but the man goes through hell and highwater for each one of them.
As for your final question, I'm trying to get at least one of them to come on here. I think it would be good for the readers to see one more example of a sister in the thick of living the plurality of wives doctrine.
Have a nice Christmas,
Gaaz